Thrilling Escapades and Judgment

This morning, I changed up my routine a little. In a thrilling twist of plot, I did the elliptical BEFORE I hit the weights.

I know, right? Pick your jaws up off the floor and take a few breaths.

Though this event has about as much effect on the world as a microscopic butterfly flapping its tiny, tiny wings in a vacuum, it actually made a difference in my workout. I actually made it a full hour on the elliptical at a hundred and sixty-three beats per minute. This is fabulous for me as I suspect that more weight will be lost via cardio than by weights. So, there's that.

I have also determined that I am no longer going to allow Livestrong to determine my caloric intake in relation to my weight. Every time I lose some weight and I tell Livestrong, I lose a few more calories. Before I changed it, for example, I was meant to eat 1134 calories per day. Obviously, this does not apply to days on which I work out because the whole point is to just have a one thousand calorie deficit (a pound is 3500 calories; therefore to lose two pounds per week, I have to have a 7000 calorie deficit, which is one thousand per day. Maths, I have them).

Anyway, I decided that less than twelve hundred is just really pushing it, so I have permanently set my calorie goal to that. Another fascinating revelation!

I can report, however, that I am a judgmental gym bitch. While I was working out while ago, this girl comes in and proceeds to do her thing. Her thing, however, was primarily squatting TWENTY POUNDS. And she was not even hitting parallel. Now, you are thinking that I really am a horrible bitch, and perhaps she is a noob and cannot do more than that.

Lies.

She ran there and had less body fat than my goal. Also, I would not have judged the twenty pounds so much if she were actually breaking parallel. I have to say, that if my gimped out self can break parallel, Runny McSkinnyPants can totally break parallel.

I do not judge her nearly as much as I judged that orange guy who kept following me around and doing what I was doing BUT ONE HIGHER and with half-assed reps, and using machines instead of free weights.

Judge judge judge judge.